I Blew Up The Clinic Real Good


I have the road in my blood
I drive a custom van
I play the tunes
I'm the neighborhood ice-cream man
So don't you mess this boy around!
The other day, when the clinic had it's local debut
Some chicks were trying to picket
The doctor threatened to sue

Now I don't care if it's a baby or a tissue blob
But if we run out of youngsters, I'll be out of a job
And so I, I did my duty cleaning up the neighborhood
I blew up the clinic real good

Try and catch me, coppers
You stinkin' badges better think again
Before you mess this boy around!
I've hung in Saigon just to see the special effects
I've hung from gravity boots for my Napoleon complex
It's time to close
Ooh...there she blows
History in the making
You picked the fight
I picked dynamite
I blew up the clinic real good

Preacher on the corner, calling it a crime
Says, 'the end don't justify the means anytime'
I stood up on my van, I yelled 'Excuse me, sir!
There ain't nothing wrong with this country that a few plastic explosives won't cure!
'

Written by Steve Taylor © 1987 Soylent Tunes

Taylor says, "A very incendiary song indeed. Reasonable people on both sides of the abortion debate could argue that this was not a song that needed to be written, but it was the unreasonable ones who made the most noise: The director of an abortion clinic in San Diego threatened a lawsuit against a video show that aired the 'clinic' clip, and when I called her at the show's request to explain that it was satire, she was so whining and obnoxious that I ended up giving her an earful of what I thought of her profession, then begged her to sue me. Australian TV's version of Geraldo Rivera did a story on me prior to a national tour there, claiming I was advocating blowing up abortion clinics - the story got picked up by all the major newspapers and eventually forced cancellation of most of the tour (forever dispelling the show biz dictum 'all press is good press'). I even spent an hour on the phone with an elderly bookstore owner in Arizona - he'd pulled the album because he thought it was wrong to blow up abortion clinics, and I congratulated him on his integrity in choosing principle over commerce before gently explaining to him the song's satirical intent. So what happened? It all seemed obvious to me - the flashing neon lyric in the middle of the song that says, 'the end don't justify the means anytime'. What better example to use than a clinic bomber (except perhaps the nutcases that are now shooting abortionists?) 'Christian' relativism's finest hour! (Okay, maybe Oliver 'proud to be a God-fearing liar' North matched it for sheer shamelessness. 'Does this mean it's OK to tell lies, Daddy?' Do I still sound angry? Does a duck have lips? Do we get the heroes we deserve, or what?) I'll take flak anytime for the right reasons, but this song was controversial for all the wrong ones."
(Taken from liner notes to "Now The Truth Can Be Told")

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